SLAA

Can I suck your dick?


I am sorry, did that sound vulgar? suggestive? inappropriate? well guess what, that same exact thought comes to mind very often when I am talking to a guy. well not any guy, but someone I find remotely attractive.

why am I even sharing this with you? I guess it is to say “hey, I am sober, but I am not cured” we all have crazy thoughts that pop in our heads, but we do not have to act on them. easier said than done, I know, but it can be done.

when the thought comes, I try to not indulge it, I pray and ask my higher power to guide me. I try to focus on the individuality of the person I am speaking to rather than his or my sexuality. I also do what many addicts call “playing the tape forward”. so, let’s say I act on it, fun for five minutes or fifty minutes if I am lucky, and then what? the remainder of the tape is never appealing, so I take it out of the VCR and play a new thought instead.

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SLAA

It’s your call


there is a saying: “wheter you think you can or you think you can’t, in both cases you are right.” today I texted my sponsor in the morning to commit my day. in my head i worked out that I am busy and that it won’t be practical for me to do my step work writing. so as I am typing I realized that I am PLANNING NOT to do the work. I am actively planning it. so I rephrased my text stating that I will do at least one question of my step work. and I did. i just finished it despite a busy day, and now I even have time to tell you all about it.

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